Dancing with the Stars: Gilles Marini was robbed

No offense to adorable and talented Shawn Johnson, but Gilles Marini should have gone home with the mirror ball trophy this week on Dancing with the Stars. Marini was, hands down, the best dancer of the entire crop of celebrities each week. His performances were entertaining, sexy and passionate.

I guess I have to remember that this competition isn’t about the best dancer though. It’s about popularity. Otherwise, one of my favorite celebrities of the batch, Ty Murray, would have gone home weeks ago.

Johnson did an excellent job each week, especially considering her youth and the maturity that some of the dances required. Kudos to Johnson for her fighting spirit and technique, but I still preferred Marini’s routines each time, and so did the judges. So, I’m perplexed at how Johnson upset the leading scorer, Marini, to take home the trophy. It must have been the fans. She had a fan base from her Olympic gymnastics career that apparently gave her the popularity vote.

This isn’t the first time the best dancer hasn’t won the competition. Remember Mario Lopez? He didn’t win, despite being the best dancing celebrity we’d ever seen at that time. Instead, Mr. Personality Emmitt Smith took home the trophy.

Congratulations to Johnson and her partner Mark Ballas and to Marini and his partner Cheryl Burke for making it to the final. But, I want to give a special thanks to Ty Murray for giving us such an entertaining season. Since it’s a popularity contest, I almost wish he could have won, simply so we could have heard his final speech. If the bull-riding thing doesn’t work out, I think he has a career as a stand-up comic.

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Where are the “stars” on Dancing With the Stars?

by Jennifer Squires Biller

Last night, Dancing With the Stars debuted to its most-watched premiere ever. As I sat through the two-hour show, I couldn’t help but wonder, “Where are the stars?”

With the exception of a few of the contestants, most of the celebrities this season are D-list talent at best. I’m sorry, but I don’t count an unknown actor, several reality actresses, and a former ‘80s pop queen “stars.” No offense to any of these folks, who I’m sure will do a great job on the show, but ABC is billing this show as dancing with the STARS. And frankly, I’m not seeing it.

When I was a kid, (back when 8-track tapes were all the rage) we had a show called Circus of the Stars. And when I say stars, I mean stars. The celebrities that participated were all from popular TV shows or other entertainment genres. They would try their hands at circus acts, whether it was the trapeze, the tight rope, riding elephants, dagger throwing, etc. I loved watching the stars defy death with their acts. And the list of celebrities was impressive: Scott Baio, Sammy Davis Jr., Lynda Carter, Patrick Duffy, Whoopi Goldberg, Jennie Garth, Lauren Bacall, Peter Fonda, Ed Asner, Erik Estrada, Deidre Hall, James Earl Jones, Bob Newhart, Rick Schroder, William Shatner, Brooke Shields, O.J. Simpson and many more.

Yes, it was the ‘70s and ‘80s so perhaps it was a little easier to get stars on board for a fun reality show. But, I can’t help but wonder how much better Dancing With the Stars would be, if ABC could actually lure some top-notch celebrities. I bet the ratings would skyrocket, if we could watch some of our favorites put on those dancing shoes.

Can you imagine if this season’s cast included people we actually wanted to watch? Imagine Steve Carell, Neil Patrick Harris, Patrick Dempsey, Troy Aikman, Chris Rock, Betty White, Julia Louis Dreyfuss, Beyonce, Kate Walsh, Oprah Winfrey, Vanessa Williams, and Dolly Parton competing for the mirror-ball trophy. If you don’t like my list, then consider who you’d like to see steaming up the ballroom.

My point is simply this. The show is called Dancing With the Stars, and each season - with the exception of the athletes - it seems like we see fewer and fewer stars. At this rate, ABC should just rename the show Dancing With People Who Want to Become Stars.

Here’s a list of this year’s contestants:

· Belinda Carlisle & Jonathan Roberts
· David Alan Grier & Kym Johnson
· Jewel & Dmitry Chaplin
· Shawn Johnson & Mark Ballas
· Lil' Kim & Derek Hough
· Gilles Marini & Cheryl Burke
· Ty Murray & Chelsie Hightower
· Steve-O & Lacey Schwimmer
· Nancy O'Dell & Tony Dovolani
· Denise Richards & Maksim Chmerkovskiy
· Lawrence Taylor & Edyta Sliwinska
· Chuck Wicks & Julianne Hough
· Steve Wozniak & Karina Smirnoff

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Dancing With the Stars reveals cast

ABC released the names of the new cast of Dancing With the Stars Sunday night. It seems a little light on the “stars” part if you ask me.

Sadly, there’s only one name on the list that gets me remotely excited: country music star Chuck Wicks, who just happens to be the real-life boyfriend of Dancing champ Julianne Hough. (Allegedly, the two are dancing together, so be warned, it could get steamy.)

As for the rest of the dancers, ABC is staying true to form with its traditional cast cocktail: a couple comediennes - David Alan Grier and Jackass star Steve-O; several musicians - Jewel, Rapper Lil' Kim, and former Go-Go's frontwoman Belinda Carlisle; a millionaire mogul - Apple Computers co-founder Steve Wozniak; an actress and an actor - Denise Richards and Gilles Marini, aka "the naked guy from the Sex and the City movie; and plenty of athletes - rodeo star Ty Murray, (who happens to be married to fellow contestant Jewel), football great Lawrence Taylor, and Olympic gold medallist Shawn Johnson. Also dancing this season is Access Hollywood host Nancy O’Dell, who reminds me of a real-life Barbie.

I guess the good news is that Donny Osmond isn’t on the list, despite his earlier claim that he’d be doing the show.

So what do you think of this season’s contestants? Are you disappointed, excited, or ambivalent at this point?

The new season debuts March 9 at 8 p.m. ET.

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Dancing With the Stars’ costars engaged

Congratulations to Dancing With the Stars co-stars Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Karina Smirnoff, who are engaged to be married.

Maks apparently popped the question on New Year’s Eve, presenting Karina with a gorgeous Harry Winston number. Both are Ukraine natives, who have known one another for 15 years.

I have to say I didn’t see this one coming. I wasn’t aware the two were even dating, although perhaps I should have known, after watching their sexy dance last season. Seriously, I wanted a cigarette after that dance, and I don’t even smoke.

Smirnoff was involved with former Dancing partner and TV star Mario Lopez just six months ago, but their two-year relationship ended.

I’m anxious to see if the engagement is mentioned when the show gets back on the air March 9. Hopefully, we’ll get to see the two of them dance together again.

The show already has had two married couples in the cast: Edyta Sliwinska and Alec Mazo and Jonathan Roberts and Anna Trebunskaya.

Congrats Maks and Karina!

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Brooke Burke is “Dancing” Queen

E! television host Brooke Burke took home the Dancing With the Stars trophy last night with partner Derek Hough.

For anyone who watched this season’s show, Burke’s win didn’t come as a surprise. She led the competition eight out of 10 weeks. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a celebrity with such dance talent. The judges even compared her dance skills to those of the female professional dancers, high praise from judges who normally nit-pick every step.

Burke dominated the season, earning a perfect 10 score- the highest mark possible- 16 times during the competition. Her emotional Viennese waltz landed her three 10s to cinch the competition last night.

But it was her Grease routine Monday night that thrilled me. Judge Bruno said he’d only seen such wild positions in the Kama Sutra. Hough’s choreography was, in a word, brilliant. Bruno and Len said it was the best freestyle routine they had ever seen. I agree.

Warren Sapp and partner Kym Johnson also had a memorable routine Monday night to the tune of Proud Mary. I loved it so much that I’ve watched it three times. Judge Carrie Ann declared it her favorite routine of the night. And I have to agree with Len that every time I watched Sapp dance, I couldn’t stop smiling. What an entertainer he is.

Former boy band member Lance Bass claimed third place with partner Lacey Schwimmer. He chose a hip-hop routine for his freestyle, a mistake in my opinion. It was too much in his comfort zone, there were no lifts, and frankly, it was not nearly as good as the hip-hop routines we’ve seen in years past. It seems hip-hop is usually the choice of dancers for the finale, so I was thrilled to see Burke and Sapp go in a different direction in their freestyle.

Kudos voters. It was great to see the best three dancers make it to the finale. Burke deserved to win, and Sapp deserved second.

I just have to say though, is it wrong I want to have Sapp back every season? He was so much fun. I’ll miss him.

There is no word yet on who the next batch of celebrities dancing will be. But, I saw Florence Henderson, Christina Applegate, and I think Jenny McCarthy in the audience. Could they be eyeing the dance floor next?

Congrats Brooke and Derek! You deserved the trophy.

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Note to the Dancing With the Stars judges: Stop picking on Toni Braxton

Dear Bruno, Carrie Ann, and Len,

Each season, I watch Dancing With the Stars and listen as you constructively criticize the stars to push them to improve each week. Most of the time, I agree with your assessment. I appreciate that when you goad the talent, they deliver.

However, after tonight’s shows, I have to ask, have you gotten into Cloris Leachman’s muscle relaxers? Are you taking bitchy tips from Cheryl Burke? (Seriously, I’m still in shock at how rude she was to call her partner, Maurice Greene, lazy. The dude is definitely not lazy.) Judges, you’re acting nonsensical with these constant tough critiques of Toni Braxton.

For several weeks now, you’ve given Braxton mediocre scores and less-than-glowing comments, despite her sharp routines. But tonight, when she performed a gorgeous, fun dance, you rewarded her with even more tough comments and more mediocre scores (seven, seven, and an eight.) Adding salt to the wound, Carrie Ann and Len awarded Braxton sevens, the very same score they gave to Cloris Leachman’s dance. Even more puzzling, is the fact that mediocre dancer Susan Lucci seems to do no wrong in their eyes. The judges lavished praise on Lucci, along with some criticism, for her dull hustle and awarded her the same scores as Braxton.

What gives, judges? Did Braxton tick you off in another life? Why are you consistently so tough on her, while Lucci, Leachman, and the other dancers don’t perform at her level?

Please explain.

Seriously disillusioned,
Tube Talk Girl

P.S. Can you slip Cheryl Burke some happy pills?

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Tube News

Jason Priestley fans, the former Beverly Hills 90210 star is directing a new show on GAC called The Road Hammers. The show follows a Canadian country music band as they negotiate a U.S. record deal. The show premieres Thursday, June 12, at 8:30 p.m. ET on GAC.

The romance between former Dancing With the Stars partners Mario Lopez and Karina Smirnoff is apparently over. Smirnoff told the New York Post that she and Lopez are still friends but that they are busy right now concentrating on their careers. Lopez, is currently on Broadway starring in A Chorus Line.

Beloved TV star Kelsey Grammer is out of the hospital and doing well, following a mild heart attack recently. Grammer suffered the heart attack while paddle boarding in Hawaii.

Patrick Swayze has signed for a new show on A&E called Beast. Swayze will play an FBI agent at odds with internal affairs. Swayze is battling pancreatic cancer, but his doctor has cleared him for work. He’s signed on for 13 episodes.

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Kristi Yamaguchi wins Dancing With the Stars

COPYRIGHT ©2008 American Broadcasting Companies, Inc. After ten weeks of entertaining drama, camaraderie and dazzling performances, Kristi Yamaguchi and her professional partner Mark Ballas, were crowned champion of "Dancing with the Stars," in the two-part season finale

Kristi Yamaguchi will have to make room for some shiny new bling beside her Olympic gold medal. Last night, she and partner Mark Ballas took home the mirror-ball trophy as the winners of this season’s Dancing With the Stars.

Yamaguchi has led the pack the entire season, scoring perfect to almost perfect scores on every dance. The judges said her technique is flawless and her performance skills continued to improve each week. They claimed that she was the most perfect dancer they’ve ever seen in any season of the show.

Yamaguchi was my early pick to win, based on skill, but I wasn’t sure America would vote for her. A woman has not won the trophy since season one, and this year, two men, NFL player Jason Taylor and Latino actor Cristian de la Fuente, were both crowd pleasers.

The finale came down to a dance-of between Taylor and Yamaguchi, and they both earned perfect scores for their efforts.

Congratulations Kristi and Mark! It’s about time a lady won this thing again. And congratulations to all the dancers and judges who gave us a great season of true professionalism and entertainment.

COPYRIGHT ©2008 American Broadcasting Companies, Inc.

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Marissa Jaret Winokur done Dancing

The most gregarious dancer on this season’s Dancing With the Stars, and perhaps ever, left the dance floor last night. Tony winner and Broadway star Marissa Jaret Winokur took her final bow, or should I say hip shimmy, before bidding adieu to her fans and fellow contestants.

That leaves Cristian, Jason, and Kristi to battle it out in the finals.

I truly loved Marissa and thought the judges were too harsh on her this week, but truth be told, I think the final three are the best dancers of the lot. Cristian has really improved to the point that I look forward to his routines every week. And of course, Kristi, as always, is smooth and entertaining. And Jason has added more than just poses to his routine, so he has improved, too.

It’s going to be a tough final. All three are talented, driven, and true competitors.

I did find it odd that no one in the semifinals scored a perfect 30. Has that ever happened before at this level? I’m not sure. The semi-finals are usually where magic is made. I hope we get some perfect 30 scores in the finals.

I still think Kristi is the best dancer, but Jason is so popular with fans, he may dance away the winner. And we can’t count out Cristian. Despite that he was in the bottom two, the man seems to crank it up a notch every week. Next week should be the best competition showcase of the season thus far

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Shannon Elizabeth booted from Dancing With the Stars

Despite a serious injury that occurred during a routine that will require Cristian de la Fuente to have surgery, he wasn’t the one leaving Dancing With the Stars Tuesday night. Shannon Elizabeth was the one to go.

Once again, voters made the right decision. Shannon had a go-get-‘em attitude (not to mention other attributes,) but she was an awkward mover at times, and the least talented of the dancers left.

What I don’t get is how Cristian is going to go on with a ruptured tendon? He said his doctor gave him the OK, but I’m guessing this means his dancing will be comprised. I’m assuming there won’t be any lifts in his and Cheryl’s future routines.

For the first week since the competition began, Kristi and Mark weren’t at the top of the leader board. Their cha-cha was too hip-hoppy for judge Len Goodman, and he gave them an eight, despite his fellow judges awarding them 10s.

This week’s leader was Jason Taylor. Again, I enjoy his dancing, but I feel like his choreography needs a change up. Even Len commented this week that he does the same pose over and over again. I’ve called Edyta out on this choreography issue before. She did the same thing last year with Cameron Mathison. Add some more dance content, Edyta, and stop with all the posing! Jason can dance. He doesn’t need to just pose and look pretty.

Finally, the judges gave Marissa and Tony three nines. For the past three weeks, Len had given them only eights. I was thrilled to see them pull a 27.

Next week, will be the most difficult week to say goodbye to a dancer. We’re left with a talented group and deciding who will go will be tough. I’m guessing it will be either Marissa or Mario, or perhaps Cristian, depending on how much his injury affects his performance.

I’d love to be able to talk about Shannon and Derek’s departing comments, but my DVR cut off the last few minutes of the show, right at the mark when it was down to Shannon and Marissa. I had to go to the Internet to find out who actually got the boot.

Is this some ploy by ABC to get people to stop using DVRs and start watching live? If so, it’s not going to work. There is no way possible I could sit through the overstuffed results show each week without a fast forward button, no matter how frustrated I get that after watching this show for two nights straight I miss the most important moment. Shame on you, ABC. Your viewers deserve better.

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Marlee Matlin eliminated from Dancing With the Stars

Deaf actress Marlee Matlin was the latest celebrity eliminated from Dancing With the Stars. Despite a pep talk from her longtime friend The Fonz, aka Henry Winkler, Matlin couldn’t nail the fast-paced difficult Latin dance the samba.

Matlin may not have been able to hear well enough to precisely hit every beat, but I thought she did a great job. Plus, she looked incredible! I’ll miss Marlee and her newcomer partner Fabian. They were a lot of fun this year.

The first perfect score finally was posted last night. No surprise here, it went to Kristi and Mark for their fun-kicking jive. Mario and Karina weren’t far behind with their smoking hot rhumba, but it was too “raunchy” for Len’s taste.

I thought Marissa and Tony performed their best dance yet, with their beautiful waltz. Marissa looked like she was floating, and her lines were beautiful. They should have earned straight nines, but Len gave them an eight. Unbelievable! That’s what he’s given her the last two weeks, and I don’t understand it because this dance was a giant improvement over previous weeks. Come on, Len, open your eyes!

Shannon once again faced the judges’ wrath for her lack of hip movement during the rhumba. Bruno said it’s an absolute essential of the rhumba and she had “none.” Ouch. Even harsher than the judges’ critique was co-host Samantha Harris’ post-dance interview with Shannon and Derek, where she kept pressing them on their rumored romance. Enough, Samantha! This isn’t TMZ. It’s clear for anyone who saw those photos this week of Shannon and Derek kissing that something is going on. Samantha, how about asking Shannon a relevant dance question like, “How much did you work on your hip movement that the judges keep harping on?”

Next week, Shannon or Marissa are probably vulnerable, if voters rank the dancers based on talent. If it’s Shannon, I shudder to even think about Samantha’s exit interview.

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"Dancing" star Julianne Hough’s country music video

Professional dancer and two-time Dancing With the Stars champ Julianne Hough is trying out another career. She’s aspiring to become a country music superstar.

Here’s a look at her new music video for “Song in My Head.”

You know I love Julianne. She’s my favorite pro female dancer on Dancing With the Stars, and her choreography is always the best. She’s gorgeous, sweet and oh-so talented. I have no doubt she’s going to be a raging success in the country music genre. (Why is it that some women get the whole package and the rest of us just pieces?)

Hough is already booked to go on tour with country music superstar Brad Paisley this summer. Not a bad first gig, Julianne.

Sometimes, I forget that this talented young lady is only 19-years-old. Sit back, hit play and enjoy this video of Julianne in her cutoff denim shorts. For all you guys, thank me later!

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Priscilla Presley says good-bye to Dancing With the Stars

Priscilla Presley didn’t get enough votes to keep her Dancing With the Stars. She was the latest celebrity let go from the show.

Presley’s performance this week failed to wow the judges, earning her the lowest score of the week. She missed a turn and her timing seemed off during her sexy rhumba. Her split was impressive though, and she always seemed to play the part of the dance. I’ll miss that.

My favorite dance of the week was Mario and Karina’s fun little Latin number. Mario can really move his hips, and Karina looked incredible in that yellow outfit, what there was to it. They got straight nines for their effort for a total of 27, but still couldn’t topple the powerhouse couple of the season – Kristi and Mark. They earned a 29 for their tantalizing rhumba.

All the dancing this week was good, but one thing is bugging me. The judges seem mesmerized by Jason Taylor and Edyta, no matter what they do. Don’t get me wrong, Jason is a strong dancer, but I thought Cristian’s rhumba was actually better. He moved the whole time, had incredible hip action, and it flowed from movement to movement. In contrast, Jason seems to have a pattern of extending his arm in poses, while Edyta dances about him, which I’m sure is the choreography that Edyta creates. Yes, his extensions are beautiful, but I don’t think the level of difficulty is the same as it was for Cristian’s dance or Marissa’s dance. Yet, the judges gave Jason three nines, to outscore Cristian and Marissa. I’m baffled.

The inspiration for the night was Marlee. The samba is a difficult dance with fast beats, hard for a normal person, let alone someone who is deaf. She slipped a couple times and was off the timing, but the dance looked great to me. I don’t have a professional eye to watch every foot placement, but she entertained and sometimes that’s just as important.

I was thrilled for Marissa and Tony this week. She really worked it during the fast-paced samba. The judges said it was Marissa’s best routine, but the scores didn’t reflect that. They gave her triple eights, the same score as last week. Strange, right?

I still think the finale is going to come down to Kristi and Jason. And as much as I like Jason, I’m hoping a female claims the mirror-ball trophy this year.

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Dancing With the Stars: Adios Adam!

His entertaining unicycle routine and pencil-thin mustache during his Zorro-themed dance couldn’t save Adam Carolla this week. He and partner Julianne Hough were sent packing.

It was the right choice, voters, despite that many of you are going to miss Carolla’s wisecracking.


Kristi and Mark danced an incredible Paso Doble, that in my opinion should have earned a perfect score. But judge Len Goodman didn’t agree, giving the couple their only nine, saying that he felt Kristi danced every dance the same. It’s clear to me that Len is judging Kristi on another level than he is the other dancers. Perhaps because she’s just so good. In the end, they got two 10s and a nine.

Marlee and Fabian had so much emotion in their waltz that it made judge Carrie Ann cry. Those two have incredible chemistry. Their dance was one of my favorites of the night. The judges picked on her for posture, giving the couple straight eights, but I thought they were fantastic.

Jason and Edyta were the big shocker of the night for me. It’s hard to conceive how a man the size of Jason Taylor could embody grace and elegance, but his waltz was both of those. Len remarked, “That was a wow of a waltz.” And Bruno declared that they managed to make the waltz sexy and that he’d never seen anything like it. Taylor did stumble during the dance, but that didn’t deter the judges from awarding high marks. They earned two perfect scores of 10 and Len’s nine.

Another sizzling couple was Derek and Shannon. Their waltz was sexy, too, or a “spring awakening” as Len said. He awarded them the only 10 he’s given out so far this season. Their overall score was a 28, though. Their routine ended with a simulated kiss, but co-host Samantha Harris implied that romance was actually brewing between Shannon and Derek. (Well, it’s not like it hasn’t happened on this show before!)

Priscilla and Louis were also impressive. They danced a beautiful waltz, but their lift cost them points with the judges and the pair landed in the bottom two rankings. Mario and Karina were passionate in their Paso, but Len said that all of Mario’s dances seemed the same. Still, their marks were high enough to keep them in the competition.

Marissa and Tony redeemed themselves with the judges this week, after being called “boring” by Carrie Ann last week. They danced an impressive Paso, and I was happy to see Carrie Ann heap them with praise.

Cristian and Cheryl were hot with their Paso, but I could have done without his yelling throughout the routine. Their behind- the-scenes footage was interesting, though. I don’t ever remember Cheryl being so cranky in past seasons. Do you?

I think everyone expected Adam to leave this week, but it’s next week when things will get difficult. All the dancers left are capable. I was a bit surprised that Priscilla who has had such high scores week to week landed in the bottom two. Apparently, she just isn’t popular with the masses.

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Tube News

It’s been some times since I’ve done a news roundup, but interesting TV tidbits are popping up all over the ‘net, and I wanted to share. Here we go.

James Van Der Beek on How I Met Your Mother
Former Dawson’s Creek star James Van Der Beek is scheduled to guest on How I Met Your Mother in the upcoming Robin Sparkles episode, according to E!Online. The Beek is rumored to be a crush of Ms. Sparkles. Hmmm, I would have taken Robin for more of the Pacey type, myself.

Eddie Cibrian to star on Ugly Betty
One of my favorite TV stars is set to guest for three episodes on Ugly Betty in a role that could continue into next season. Eddie Cibrian, or as I prefer to call him, “Dimples,” is allegedly signed on as a love interest for Betty’s sister, Hilda. (Lucky girl.) Cibrian will play Justin’s gym teacher, according to TV Guide. If this means Dimples will be running around in gym shorts, then I’m for it.

Las Vegas creator headed to Knight Rider
Regular readers know my love for Las Vegas boss Gary Scott Thompson, so I’m somewhat excited that he’s been tapped as executive producer of the new Knight Rider series. (According to TV Guide.) I watched the pilot movie on NBC previously this year, and I was bitterly disappointed. Hopefully, Thompson can make the show worth watching or at least give K.I.T.T. something more to do.

Derek Hough of Dancing With the Stars sent to hospital
Dancer Derek Hough was taken by ambulance from the set of Dancing With the Stars yesterday, for what was later diagnosed as a strained neck, according to E!Online. Hough was rehearsing with his sister and fellow pro Mark Ballas when he was injured. Hough was back for the live show Tuesday night and removed his neck brace for the live show. He did not dance Tuesday night.

Simon Baker signed on for new CBS show
It’s a good week for news on all my favorite TV boyfriends. Simon Baker, who I’ve been crushing on since The Guardian, has signed on to the upcoming CBS show The Mentalist. Baker will play a guy who has a heightened sense of observation that he uses to solve crimes. No word yet on whether he’ll be using his yummy Aussie accent for the role.

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“The Gute” gets the boot on Dancing With the Stars

He didn’t earn the lowest score from the judges this week, but voters must have thought Steve “The Gute” Guttenberg didn’t dance as well as the rest of the contestants. The voters were right.

I’m not sure what the judges were watching, but how they came up with the scores this week baffled me.

Guttenberg’s tango was fun, but not up to the technical level of his counterparts, yet it earned him straight 7s. Perhaps he earned sympathy with the judges because his partner, Anna, fell ill during the week, and Steve had to practice the dance with her husband, Jonathan. I’m just glad that America realized that despite being a super nice guy and a good entertainer, “The Gute” just didn’t have the skills to stay for another week.

The biggest “huh” moment of the week was the judges’ harsh treatment of Marissa Jaret Winokur. Her jive was really good, certainly better than Steve’s tango, yet Steve didn’t get a tongue-lashing from the torturous trio or score two 6s. Carrie Ann said she was “bored” with Marissa and Tony’s routine. How that was possible is beyond me. I’m glad everyone phoned in to keep Marissa in the competition.

The other head-scratcher for me was the triple seven score of Marlee Matlin. In my opinion, she should have earned 8s. The fact that she could jive like that and not hear the beat, well, it’s beyond impressive. Plus, she’s animated and so much fun to watch.

The most improved dancer was Adam Carolla. I know, I’m shocked, too. He was actually pretty decent. Although his attempts to be funny usually annoy me, this week, I was cracking up. His comments about the usually sexy Julianne’s hair and wardrobe had me howling. “I don’t know who dressed this little gal, but the Sandy Duncan wig and the friar’s frock is not helping our cause,” Carolla cracked, as the audience erupted in laughter. I agree Adam. I never thought it possible to make hottie Julianne Hough look matronly.

Priscilla Presley rebounded this week with an impressive tango, earning her two 9s and an 8. Jason Taylor, however, failed to impress Len, who told him “one week you’re a rooster, the next week you’re a feather duster.” Ouch. No worries, Jason, I don’t think anyone else would ever call you a feather duster.

As usual, Kristi Yamaguchi was flawless, and Cristian de la Fuente was good, too. But, Mario “bitterly” disappointed Len and earned him one 6 for his tango. Perhaps, he’ll reduce his touring schedule a little this week to focus more on his dancing.

Who will go next is a toss up. I think it should be Adam, as he’s the least talented now of the group, but as we all know, this show is often more about popularity than dance talent.

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Penn Jillette and Monica Seles say goodbye to Dancing With the Stars

You made the right choice, America. Thank you!

Last night, you sent the two least-talented dancers home from Dancing With the Stars: entertainer/illusionist Penn Jillette and tennis-great Monica Seles.

No amount of magic tricks could convince the audience that Jillette could actually dance. I’m not sorry he’s leaving. I don’t think there has ever been a more annoying contestant on the show. Jillette constantly interrupted the judges during their critiques, by trying to make jokes and get laughs. Then, he jokingly tripped going up the stairs. He wasn’t funny, and his partner Kym Johnson looked like she wanted to tape his mouth shut as much as I did.

Monica Seles, on the other hand, was every bit a pleasure to have on the show. She was elegant, sweet, and really came out of her shell on Monday to do a sexy, sultry number. It wasn’t up to the level of the other dancers, as she just seems to be an awkward mover, but hey, she tried. It was refreshing to see someone who was so at the top of her game in one area, not be able to master another physical challenge. It’s inspirational to us common folk to realize that celebrities aren’t always good at everything, even when they’re gorgeous and seem to have skills the rest of us don’t. Monica gets an A for effort, and I wish her well.

As for the rest of the dancers, I think it’s obvious who is the best this year. Kristi Yamaguchi and partner Mark Ballas earned the highest first-round scores in the history of the show, straight nines for both dances. It’s rare to be able to pick the best dancer so early in the competition, but wow, she can dance. There is no question.

So, I’m officially endorsing Ms. Kristi as my pick. Yes, I know that Jason Taylor is pretty and can move, too, but it’s time a woman won this thing! And Kristi is the best we’ve ever had. She and Mark just look fantastic together. I was worried that she wouldn’t be able to pull off the sexy, mambo, but she tossed out that prim, proper elegance she’s known for and got all kinds of wild sexy for the number. But, dance lovers, you MUST vote for Kristi, if you want her to stay. (Wow, I just sounded like co-host Samantha Harris there, Sorry.) We’ve seen plenty of talented ladies leave early (Hello, Sabrina Bryan and Stacy Keibler) because people thought they were so good they didn’t need votes. So, please, vote for Kristi, people, every week. We haven’t seen a female take home the mirror ball trophy since Kelly Monaco in season one, and then the DWTS folks had the audacity to make her dance again for it and crown a guy the champion. Enough! This is our year. Come on ladies; make me proud. I’m starting to think this show is sexist.

Other great performances this week were Jason Taylor, or “King of the Mambo,” as the judges named him and Shannon Elizabeth’s impressive quickstep. I enjoyed Taylor’s dance, but I think Elizabeth should have earned equally high marks as he did. Her dance looked much more difficult, and she was so precise, hardly breaking hold the entire time. Taylor had some mambo moves, but I didn’t think he was better than Elizabeth. He seemed to do a lot of long-stretch holds and poses, while his partner Edyta Sliwinska flitted around him. He’s capable of great dancing though, so I look forward to next week.

Mario also did a good job, and I loved Marissa Jaret Winokur’s energy. And Marlee Matlin continues to impress. How a deaf person can dance that well is a mystery to me. I also love her partner Fabian Sanchez. He’s a cutie with a great attitude. Well done, DWTS, for replacing Maks with this guy.

Next week, I’m hoping Adam Carolla hits the road. He’s up for the second most annoying contestant ever, due to his comments back to the judges and his constant attempts to be funny.

Note to DWTS folks: Please stop casting comedians. It’s much more enjoyable to watch people that are naturally funny, such as Helio Castronveves, George Hamilton and Jerry Springer than those who think it’s their job to crack jokes every three minutes. We’ve got host Tom Bergeron for that.

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Dancing With the Stars: move over macho, it’s ladies’ night

Last night, the ladies took the floor. And figure skater Kristi Yamaguchi showed her dance skills aren’t limited to the ice rink.

Yamaguchi earned the highest score of any contestant, male or female, with a whopping 27. Judge Bruno said it was one of the best first-round performances he’d ever seen and declared it “absolutely wicked.” I agree. Yamaguchi had beautiful lines and stunning moves, not a shock to anyone who has ever seen her skate. The question is will America vote for her, or will she suffer the Sabrina Bryan syndrome in that people think she’s so good she won’t need the votes or that her past experience gives her an unfair advantage? Time will tell.

Everyone was waiting to see deaf actress Marlee Matlin take the floor, and ABC took full advantage of that by making her the last female celebrity to dance. Way to force folks to watch the whole show, ABC! Matlin was great. Bruno said he counted throughout her number and she barely missed a beat. She received a standing ovation, as did Marissa Jaret Winokur and Priscilla Presley.

The biggest surprise of the night was that Presley, the oldest contestant, was one of the best dancers. The woman can move! Now, if they could only get her to smile and look like she’s having a good time. She so serious and tense I thought she was going to break out in tears at any moment. Dancing is fun, ‘Cilla, embrace it!

Someone who did embrace the dance was Marissa Jaret Winokur. What a fun, spunky gal. And she can dance! I never thought it was possible for anyone to smile more than former champ Helio Castroneves, but this girl did it. She is the definition of the word “inspiring.” I’m guessing she’s a double-digit size, not the typical size two we’re used to seeing on the show, yet she signed up for this competition that will force her to wear skimpy, body-baring costumes and compete against women who look like they stepped off a runway. You go girl! Her effort brought the crowd to their feet for a standing ovation. She could be a fan favorite. I know she’s one of mine already. That said, I have to chastise her partner Tony Dovolani for his choreography. They were doing the cha-cha, but he turned the number into a hip-hop piece, with hardly a cha-cha anywhere in sight. Sigh. Why, Tony, why? The girl can dance. Give her a shot. This isn’t the first time I’ve had issue with Tony’s choreography. When he was partnered with Stacy Keibler, I often thought he didn’t match the routine to her talent. What gives?

Shannon Elizabeth was the first contestant to dance, and she did a decent job. She was really stiff at times, though. But, her legs are incredible. Plus, she’s a lot of fun. Her tomboy gung-ho attitude made her quite charming to viewers.

Monica Seles looked beautiful in her “princess” gown, a nod to the fact that she never got to go to her prom due to her professional tennis commitments. However, her dancing left much to be desired. She’s such an awkward mover, I’m not sure she can turn her tennis skills into ballroom skills. She gets a 10 for effort, though.

My final comment isn’t about the dancers but co-host Samantha Harris. No offense to Harris, but as a viewer I sometimes have trouble understanding her. She seems to swallow her words, not to mention that she constantly awkwardly cuts off the contestants mid-sentence. I’m begging ABC. Please, please, please bring back Drew Lachey as a co-host. He has great comic rapport with host Tom Bergeron, and unlike Harris, he seems so at ease talking with the celebrities.

On Monday, the results of this week’s dance will be revealed and one female and one male will go home. I’m guessing it will be Seles and Penn Jillette, but I could be wrong.

So, who are you rooting for, now that we’ve seen all the contestants dance? Share your picks in the comments below.

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Dancing With the Stars: The men debut their skills

My favorite guilty pleasure returned last night, and it was a chance to meet the men of the Dancing With the Stars competition. From what I saw, I think a guy may win again this year.

Three men in particular were fierce: R&B singer Mario, NFL star Jason Taylor, and actor Christian de la Fuente.

Mario has moves that would make anyone blush. Did you see that hip action? Wow! He definitely has the hip-hop element, but I’m not sure how that will translate into the more formal ballroom dances.

Jason Taylor is the guy to watch. He has all the tools; he just needs to practice and improve. He’s shockingly elegant to be so large. His arm and leg extensions were gorgeous, and his posture and frame were perfect. He just needs to work on the performance element that makes it look like he’s having a good time. Taylor could go all the way. He has the football fan base that served Emmitt Smith and Jerry Rice well, and Taylor is a good dancer.

Cristian de la Fuente certainly has the moves, but his attitude was a put off from the get-go. Can you say cocky? The minute he saw that Cheryl Burke was his partner, he commented that they had a chance to win. Perhaps it wasn’t meant to be a slam toward the other pro female dancers, but it kind of came across that way. He had great moves, but his posture needs work. His shoulders were constantly hunched down. But, I’m sure Burke will whip him into shape in no time.

The entertainer of the night proved to be the loveable Steve Guttenberg. No, he didn’t have the technicality and precision of some of the other guys, but the man entertained the audience. His smile is infectious. He’s this year’s George Hamilton, when it comes to mesmerizing the crowd. His dance skills need work, though, so hopefully, he’ll get to stick around long enough to refine them.

As for Penn Jillette and Adam Carolla, well, let’s just say they’re awkward movers and leave it at that. Jillette moved his feet well, but his upper body was so stiff and his moves so stompy that Bruno compared him to Shrek. (An accurate description in my opinion.) Carolla didn’t fare much better. He was as stiff as Frankenstein and ended up with the lowest score of the evening, despite being paired with two-time champ Julianne Hough.

Here’s a note for Jillette and Carolla, please STOP talking back and over the judges. There is nothing more annoying. We know you’re trying to be funny, but it just comes across as obnoxious. Believe it or not, we actually want to hear what the judges have to say, and it’s hard to do that when you’re cutting them off. I’d be happy to see either of these guys depart.

The ladies dance tonight. The fun and skimpy costumes start at 9 p.m. on ABC.

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Dancing With the Stars returns tonight

Get ready to shimmy, shake and gyrate. Or if you prefer not to dance along, sit on your sofa and watch celebrities in skimpy costumes.

Tonight, Dancing With the Stars returns to ABC at 8 p.m.

It’s too early to pick a favorite, but I think everyone is expecting Gold medal winner Kristi Yamaguchi to do well. She obviously has some dance experience. (She dances on ice skates, people, so how hard can a ballroom floor be?) Plus, she’s an athlete, and historically, they always do well in the competition. (Hello Emmitt Smith, Apolo Anton Ono, Helio Castroneves, Jerry Rice and Laila Ali.)

The big buzz this season is that for the first time one of the contestants is deaf: Marlee Matlin. I know plenty of you will be tuning in to see how she’s going to do.

Check back tomorrow for my take on this new crop of celebrities and their dancing skills, or in some cases, lack thereof.

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