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Thursday, May 25, 2006

"Lost" season finale

by Jennifer Squires Biller

After watching the crazy Lost finale, I’m sure you’re busy dissecting the complex plot points and deciphering the significance of numerous props. I, however, have one concern. Why is it that my Sawyer ends up at the end of a gun barrel at the end of every season?

Last year he took a bullet to the shoulder and a header into shark-infested waters, and this year he’s bound and gagged with a shotgun pointed in his back. Clearly The Others missed his “There’s a new sheriff in town” speech, or those beard-wearing freaks would be quaking in their…wait, they don’t actually wear shoes, do they? Nevermind.

Never — and I repeat — never have I been so disgruntled by a television show as I currently am Lost. Not when the Dawson’s Creek kids went away to college and temporarily lost their minds, not when Ally McBeal’s Billy bleached his hair blonde and started hanging out with Robert-Palmer girls and not when Buffy spent more time preaching to future slayers than staking vampires. All of that pales in comparison to the frustration I experienced during the Lost season finale.

I like to think I’m a patient gal, but guess what? I’m all out of patience for this island of misfits. Tonight’s preview touted that “The answers you’ve been waiting for are here.” Umm…not so much. Only a few answers were given. We found out what happens when the numbers aren't entered. We found out the plane crashed because the magnetic energy sucked it into the ocean in 2004 and that the bright light Locke saw in the hatch last year was courtesy of Desmond. And we found out that perhaps “Henry Gale” is “Him,” whatever that means.

We still know little about The Others. We don’t know what’s up with Walt’s powers. We don’t know about the voices, the Polar bear, the monster, the island's healing powers, the ghosts, the numbers, the injections, that creepy Owl, Frenchie, the black rock, the radio transmissions, the food replenishment and Marvin Candle’s hand. The one thing we do know is that if you’re a single woman even thinking about having sex on that island, you’ll be pushing up sand-fleas soon. (Note to Kate: no matter how sexy Jack and Sawyer look in the jungle, don’t go there, girl.)

I was hoping the finale would explain some of the mysteries from season one. Call me crazy, but I think two years is a long time to ask viewers to try and remember plot details that may or may not be meaningless. (Polar bear, monster and Watership Down anyone?) Yes, we got a few answers, but not enough to satisfy this loyal Lost viewer.

I realize I’m probably in the minority with this less-than-glowing review of the finale. My friend Anthony, who has analyzed Lost with me from its debut, loved it. He hated last year’s ender, but thought this one gave him just enough answers. It left him wanting more, he said. It left me reaching for a bottle of aspirin. Sorry buddy.

I’m with Sawyer, I think aliens are behind this whole crazy mess. I’m guessing aliens with four toes, considering that weird statue. I’m joking, people. I’ve given up trying to figure out this show, and that saddens me. I don’t know if it was all the stops and starts in the Lost schedule or the myriad plot threads and prop symbols that overwhelmed me, but somewhere along the way I’ve lost my addiction to Lost. Yes, I still watch, but not with the anticipation and fervor I once did.

I did enjoy seeing The O.C.’s Caleb Nichol in the Desmond flashback. And I couldn’t help but chuckle that Desmond’s choice of what to read on his deathbed is Charles Dickens. But it’s the little things that bug me, like why Claire is fine with injecting her baby with an unknown drug she knows nothing about, and why the island folks aren’t knocking each other down to get to that sailboat and head for civilization.

As we head into the summer to contemplate the Lost adventure, I leave you with these thoughts. Is it a coincidence that Desmond looks like Jesus? (You know you were thinking it, too, “brother.”) Are Eko and Locke dead? Did Libby kill her husband? Are Michael and Walt in Fiji sipping Shirley Temples? And will Sawyer get to use his guns again? (Not those guns, sickos, his weapons.) Wait. His firearms.

Kudos to whomever named this show. I can’t think of a better title than Lost, considering that’s exactly how I feel when I watch it.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Funny article. Love your site!!!!Do you think "Cal" from The OC is the man pulling all the strings?

tube talk girl said...

Yes I do! I think he may be the big guy in charge. (That's a fearless prediction from Tube Talk Girl.) He seems to have the money and power to finance the Dharma experiment. My friend Chaelyn thinks so, too, and I've learned never to argue with a lawyer! Also, how cool was it to hear "Cal's" real accent? I wish he would have used it on The O.C.

Anonymous said...

are you crazy?????? were we watching the same show? i'm 40 y/o female and i was watching more then james ford, maybe you should too??

tube talk girl said...

LOL Yes, Mollyjam, I'm certifiable. Haven't you heard? You're absolutely right that I should watch more than James, but he is quite the distraction. There were plenty of other things to analyze, too, and I'm intrigued by the Arctic folks, "Cal", Libby being a possible twin and a million other theories that make my head explode trying to figure them all out. Yes I LOVE this show, but it makes me want to throw things from time to time. It's still the best of what TV has to offer and the fact that it makes me crazy is exactly why I keep watching.

tube talk girl said...

Rae-don't apologize for commenting. I love hearing readers' opinions. Rant away. Your magnetic healing theory is interesting. I hadn't considered that. As I recall the pilot did not say why they were off course, just that they were 1,000 miles?? off course. I too don't understand why folks aren't more curious. I guess they can't have everyone trying to solve myteries, but some closure on certain aspects would be good. (The black smoke, the polar bear, the hatches.)

Anonymous said...

and the Lost-asuarus monster? what happened to him? He was given the impression to be H-U-G-E, the first season, able to move large groups of trees with his girth or power, (not to mention, chasing Maggie, or anyone else that was a People sized, people person.

and now we get a smoke monster, and gear sounds-- changes are inevitable, but leading us down a path, where they kill our main and beloved characters;

and previously did so, because Kate was jealous of a prettier (Grace, re: Maggie?) and I suggest that she is the b*tca, who loses it; and her job--forever-- after all? she was only a dead body before being cast, and never had a speaking part-- it's dangerous, for a show, any show; to kill off and damage the core group of those you care about on the show at the first, and then-- care MORE about and without DAMAGING fans caring about whether or not we DO indeed, see a show.

if they don't care about the things they have done? I'm not real sure, that I care about the tv show-- my family and I? can do without, and walk away easily

(after all, the most attractive (and further interesting story line possibilities) boone and Shannon (Maggie Grace,) were already sacrificied) and I think that's a lot; on a successful tv show, trying to build a core and loyal audience-- one that wants it to be a success and plans to be so)

we're getting into the "too much" of stupid," regarding the deaths and story lines here -- they involve casts, and their pasts, present, and future (even if only in their past life) if they expect me to care? (as well as others?) they have to give us a core group and basic story outline to care about-- not the death trap "we will go" plots they've come up with so far-- it's irriating-- out of 4 adults in our family? you've lost 2-- another couple of goofs? and We will find something else, to watch-- FOREVER

Because it already IS happening, and not just in my family (of adults) where you've lost two of four) but my online friends-- most (3/4) are electing to watch something else-- If they don't remain more consistent with the characters (as the show is SO inconsistent, and will continue if they continue this way)-- I do believe they will lose the LOST show.

It's quite hard to care about a cast (or any and all parts of the shows) with the "let's pull a death in HOllywood" crowd joining, among the shows-- (the writers must be truly desperate, since their grammar went years ago) and now this, that went on so flagrently on ANY TV show, this year.

It's now the latest thing, not the exception-- and I get sick of crowd following, especially on TV shows? very quickly!

They are destroying anything that we as fans? DO care about, between the clues-- SAD. really SAD-- I'm completely serious regarding the fans, that I have seen drop out of regular viewing and not look back--
You can't say, they weren't warned-- also? the erratic showing of tv, after the writer's strikes all those years ago? and tv NEVER went back to reruns, or what we as fans wanted. (no wonder they compete with cable-- and it's nothing to do with what they assume, the sex or nudity and profanity solution). that Hollywood tries to assume that it is--

It's the "you aren't there consitiently quotient-- and the writers and network producers, completely ignore that, while digging their own grave.

Thanks for listening-- (this is the first show, that I've seen so many former BTVS/ATS fans, in support and now disillusioned with as a show-- that's not good, for a viewer).

I think it will be in the "bon voage" group, because of it.

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